How We Started

Since November of junior year, I served on the Attorney General’s Office Teen Cyber Safety Board making power points. An ephemeral passion warmed over me as I stumbled upon cyber bullying which related to my younger years. Towards mid-November, I found myself in a vulnerable mood while I recounted the repressed memories of my elementary school bullies. Nonetheless like all fleeting emotions, my passion slowly abated as late December lurked in the shadows. The sky was thunderous and grey and the air was as thick as fog when my 4th period English teacher asked an odd question: “Are you part of the problem or part of the solution?”

At this moment, every dolorous emotion and lonesome lunch period attained a meaning—self-strengthening. For the longest time, I believed myself to be the victim of the “problem” (bullying) that people other than myself should solve. The malignant rhymes and malicious labels had beaten me into a passive shell of a man. Nevertheless, my English teacher’s subtle question threw all of the self-pity out of my mind. No longer did I wish to capitulate to the cult of normalcy defined by the select members of school society nor did I want to watch others suffer. I realized that no one could entrap me in any emotion except for myself. Bullies did not tell me to devalue myself; I told myself that I was inferior. Thus, I resolved to be a solution; I resolved to be myself.

Over the winter holiday, I spent countless hours searching for a vehicle to become a solution. Low and behold, that solution presented itself to me via a YouTube video entitled “Simple Nonprofit”. I must admit that I held seemingly insurmountable fears concerning the social repercussions to starting an anti-bullying nonprofit. Nevertheless within a month, I decided to begin filing for nonprofit status. I genuinely enjoyed the sleepless nights of planning as I had a goal. My goal was to provide victims of bullying with that which I never knew: willing compassion, empathy, and companionship.

From early February till about a month ago, I scoured Psychology Today’s website to find mental health professionals who would aid my cause. Additionally, I researched and authored a Wiki pertaining to bullying. The seven months that I spent planning and networking profoundly changed me as an individual and as a victim. Through my experience, I learned the true meaning of integrity: how you act in dark, not how you act in the light. I finally understood that absolutely no one could define me but myself. It took me almost eighteen years to realize that I truly possessed power—the ability to influence those around me.

Austin Eng

Teens Stand Together Program Manager